Wild Impulse

“Let’s pop in here!” Susan chirped.

 

In she darted and marched right up to an extensive wall display of dildos. I trailed in her wake glancing surreptitiously left and right, waiting for some cheery voice to call, Hey Paul, how’s it going! Yet none came.

We busied ourselves studying the exciting merchandise on offer, murmuring quietly. Susan stooped to study brightly coloured items on the bottom shelf while I scanned the upper reaches. A lady of advanced years sauntered over and began researching right beside me. She appeared particularly taken by some abnormally large stock, tantalizingly just out of reach of her up-stretched arm.

“Would you mind, young man?” she asked. I looked all around me to locate this juvenile she was talking to. “I’m in a hurry,” she beseeched, looking me right in the eye. Even at sixty-one I was probably twenty years her junior. I politely inquired, “Which one?”

She pointed to a huge black phallus standing alone and erect high above us. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Susan’s shoulders shaking with silent mirth. I reached for the requested cock and gripping it firmly I brought it down within her reach.

She gave me a demure smile of thanks, grabbed it with both hands and immediately thumbed a switch which set the thing whirring. I edged away watching her examination from a discreet distance. It seemed this eye-wateringly large member met her exacting requirements and she scuttled off to the checkout.

I raised my eyes at Susan. “Who knew?” I whispered.

After a lengthy perusal of the toys, with much nodding of approval, sage rubbing of chins and the occasional raised eyebrow, we took a nonchalant stroll to the lubricant display where small spritzers in alluringly dark colours stood solemnly in neat rows. Descriptors such as ‘hyperglide’ spoke seductively to our inner animal. Equally enticing was the range of subtle flavours. Caramel caught my eye and we exchanged wordless glances and barely perceptible nods.

Eager to do justice to the visit we took time to admire the inflatable partners who claimed to cater to all tastes and persuasions and promised an ultra-realistic experience, For display purposes these rubber friends were neatly flattened and folded into boxes which you could carry conveniently under one trembling arm. How thoughtful.

Leather lingerie, whips and stilettos; vibrators of every size, shape and colour; paraphernalia whose purpose we could only guess at, though the tapered ends hinted at insertion. Yes, something for everyone here. Well, anyone bold enough to come in and browse!

We checked the coast was clear of acquaintances and carried our one small purchase to the pay desk where we were greeted by a friendly old lady with a blue rinse and pearls. “Oh, caramel!” she bellowed for all to hear. “My favourite!”