26 May 2005

My head hurts

This nest box is a source of danger. There are a couple more pictures of my garden here to remind me I must mow my daisies.
I am flat out on the grass when I start to regain consciousness. My forehead feels like I have been smacked with an iron bar. I feel sick and my vision is definitely blurred. Gingerly I touch my forehead expecting to find crushed bone and a gaping hole. Instead I discover a Himalayan-sized lump.

I stumble from the garden to the house, pulling an ice pack from the freezer in the garage on my way. I don’t dare check a mirror so I sit silently white-faced in the lounge with a throbbing skull and aching pride.

Last thing I remember I had my ear to the bird-box listening for signs of life. An incessant drone told me the occupants were certainly winged but not feathered. To confirm the point a worker bee dropped from the trees and hovered, before disappearing through the entrance hole. Moments later another arrived and then a third.

I have no problem with these little guys but out of respect for a whole boxful I backed off. Just then the tiny hole spat forth a cloud of fifteen or so bees. By this time I was several feet away but when they veered towards me I turned and ran instinctively. Normally I am very aware of my precise location on this planet but somehow I had strayed unwittingly within twelve inches of a clothes-line post. Blissfully ignorant of my proximity to this fifteen foot scaffolding pole, I launched blindly at it with my head.

The sickening thud knocked me out cold.

"Your head is bent out of shape.
But your feet are on the ground."
The Walkmen - Bows and Arrows


recoveryroad said...

I really like "Fire In the Sky". Beautiful.

Perfect Virgo said...

Wouldn't recognise it as the UK would you?

doughgirl said...

OUCH!!!! Good God Perfect, you gotta be careful. Hope you are feeling better. Might want to go get checked for a concussion if that sick feeling doesnt go away, or if you start to get really tired. Have wifey keep an eye on you for the next 24 hours :)

Perfect Virgo said...

Doughgirl - clumsy, that's me all over! The swelling is going down but it sure is tender. I don't feel sick now but I am tired and probably was slightly concussed. Thanks for your concern, we'll keep an eye on it.

The bees are still popping in and out this evening and I haven't mowed my daisies yet! Where will the blue-tits nest this year? I can't turn the bees out so I'll have to get a second nesting box (a bit late now I think.)

transience said...

oh dear. i do hope you are alright. though it pains me to admit that i did giggle a little (i swear). reminds me of something that happened to me in a playground when i was younger.

Perfect Virgo said...

Transience I hope your pain was less severe than mine! It's sore and so's my pride but I'll survive. Giggle away, its ok I don't mind and I too did the same in a playground aged about 8.

Nobody else was at home to witness the event but they laughed like drains when I explained the gigantic lump. Sympathy abounds down our way!

Cocaine Jesus said...

The obvious thing to do to preserve our fragile male egos is to invent a story. A story that involves heroism and bitter blows. A battle fought between a wickedly savage mugger or burgular that you encountered, fought and won. A bit like the scar that worms its way on my abdomen. When asked I would tell my childrens friends it is where I was defending a little ol' lady from a group of hooligans who all carried blades and sliced at my stomach. It sounds soooo much better than saying it is my gall bladder op scar.
Hope the head stops throbbing.

Faith said...

Sorry dear, but your story of pain and humilation CRACKS ME UP!! I've done similar things on so many occasions I can't begin to list them. It's a definite "DOH" moment.

At least the bees are safe, right?

Mere Existence said...

Did they end up stinging you as you slept?

In High School, some chick was looking back to yell to a friend as she jogged through the out-door gym area that had poles for basketball, etc. She turned just in time to notice the metal pole coming straight at her, but not in time to do anything about it; she hit that thing square on with her forehead... hard. I was lucky to witness it, and I managed to muster a little sympathy once I picked myself up from the ground, having finally managed to stop laughing my ass off.

Perfect Virgo said...

Cocaine Jesus - love the ideas for massaging the old ego! Little old lady and tooled up hooligans, whatever next? Trouble with me is I am just too honest. Wear my heart on my sleeve!

Faith - welcome. Feel free to giggle, most have! I can't even walk through a doorway without shearing at least one kneecap off! The bees seem ok, at least they're still buzzing in and out. I'm not going to disturb them.

Rand - thankfully not! I would guess I was out for no more than a minute or so. Could have been tricky as the wife and sons had gone out. That'll teach them it's not safe to leave the old boy alone!

These incidents are hilarious I agree. Most of us feel a pang of sympathy eventually but you just gotta get the mirth out of your system first!!

Shade said...

< screams and flails about like a little girl >

Man I hate bees!

Dionysius said...

What about a mini bee-hive. Is this a swarm of honeybees or are they the pesky little yellow-jackets or wasps? They now have squatter's right in their code of the law!!

Perfect Virgo said...

Shade - they do tend to provoke that reaction I know. I like them but I still took evasive action! I have had lots of unexpected site visitors after your Forum link, thanks for the mention!

Dionysius - these are not honey bees but bumble bees. Bumble bees live in tiny colonies in a small nest. I am very pleased to see them here, they aren't agressive.

I dislike wasps though, they nest around my house every year. 12 months ago we had a basketball sized one under the house eaves, they came inside and made life rather unpleasant.

The Flea said...

Sorry mate, but I have to laugh. It's hilarious.

Reminds me of Buster Keaton.

Perfect Virgo said...

Flea - cracking good fun!!